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Health & Fitness

Madder Than Old King Cole, Meaner Than a Junkyard Bug

Misheard song lyrics-it happens to the best of us. Here's a look into some of my personal favorites. I hope you'll share yours, too!

This just in…that Paul McCartney is slipperier than you thought. Warn the authorities. It’s not just one Man on the Run. It’s a whole band of them. Including the jailer man and Sailor Sam and they were hurting everyone! And still, with all that new information to my ears it’s still just one man on the run. The man was on the run.

And if this new piece of info rocks your world as much as it rocks mine, here are some other things you must know. And -full disclosure- I JUST found this out about a month ago. It appears that Steely Dan is not reassuring a fallen star that Fame will come back to him and they aren’t even clairvoyants issuing a warning of the pain coming back either. Both of these things make sense, but instead Old SD is more concerned with talking to some girl Peg. Peg? That changes everything. I mean Peg is a girl with a long ponytail a yellow sweater and a poodle skirt. Not some favorite foreign movie buff. I like the song better when I sing it in the shower, Pain it will come back to you. Or the alternative version Fame it will come back to you. Not that I sing it all that much.

I understand the idea of singing of a woman, but you usually picture the woman to be sultry, seductive, not goody-two shoes Peg! Maybe Steely Dan should take a lesson from Nirvana. Anastasia, now there’s a temptress. When the lights down it’s less dangerous, here we are now, Anastasia. Sure sometimes she gets a little out of control-- Acting stupid and outrageous, here we are now Anastasiaaaa! But still that’s a woman worth writing a song about.

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And some women just leave a man speechless, like in the Stones song:

I’m so uh-uh-uh; I’m
so uh-uh-uh;

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I’m so uh-uh-uh and she’s so cold!

I’m a burning bike, I’m a
burning fire, I’m a bleeding volcano.

I’m so uh-uh-uh I’m so uh-uh-uh and she’s
so cold. I tried rewinding her, I tried rewinding her….

And of course, songs aren’t always about women, sometimes they’re about nature. Like the Who’s big hit:

Blue water, blue, blue,
blue blue. Blue water , Blue blue, blue, blue. Now tell me who are you? Now
tell me who are you?
  (then apparently the water replies) Blue wa,
blue wa, blue wa, blue wa. Blue wa, blue wa. Blue wa. Blue water. Blue, blue,
blue, blue.”

And sometimes songs are about cute fuzzy, woodland creatures. Like when my daughter was three she sang that famous Ramones song again and again, the one about the frisky Easter Bunny playing his favorite sport:

Peter Rabbit, Peter Rabbit, Peter Rabbit with a baseball bat! Oh yeah,
oh yeah oh oh.

Bottom line, there’s a song out there for everyone and if you can’t really find something that suits you, just change the words (along with the artists intentions) and sing your heart out. But be careful, some people take these things pretty seriously. So always look over your shoulder, watch your back and stay clear of punk rock rabbits carrying aluminum bats.

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